THE WAY WE REACT TO WHAT LIFE BRINGS ABOUT

Article by: Adriana Moldovan, Ph. D., Clinical Psychologist

TWO MONKS IN A PEREGRINATION CAME UP TO A RIVER SHORE WHERE THEY SAW A YOUNG LADY. SHE WAS DRESSED UP IN A VERY NICE OUTFIT, SO EVIDENTLY SHE DID NOT DRESS FOR THE OCCASION. THE RIVER TIDE WAS HIGH SO SHE DIDN'T QUITE KNOW HOW TO GET TO THE OPPOSITE SIDE OF THE RIVER WITHOUT GETTING HER CLOTHES SOAKED. WITHOUT HESITATING, ONE OF THE MONKS OFFERED HER TO GET HER ACROSS SO HE LIFTED HER UP AND CARRIED HER ON HIS BACK ALL THE WAY TO THE OPPOSITE SHORE WHERE HE PUT HER BACK DOWN ON HER FEET. THE TWO MONKS CARRIED ON WITH THEIR JOURNEY. SOME TIME AFTER, THE SECOND MONK STARTED TO PREACH: " CERTANLY, IT IS NOT GOOD TO TOUCH A WOMAN, HAVING A CLOSE CONTACT WITH WOMEN GOES AGAINST OUR BELIEF". HOW COULD YOU GO AGAINST OUR BELIEVES? THE MONK THAT HAD HELPED THE WOMAN KEPT WALKING IN SILENCE, UNTIL HE FINALLY REPLIED: "I LEFT HER BY THE RIVER ONE HOUR AGO, ARE YOU STILL BRINGING HER WITH YOU?"

THE WISDOM OF THE ZEN MASTERS, IMGARD SCHKOEGL

WHAT SIDE DO WE CHOOSE TO BE ON? WHAT MONK DO WE USUALLY IDENTIFY OURSELVES WITH? WHAT READING DO WE USUALLY DO ABOUT THE REALITY WE FIND OURSELVES IN EVERYDAY?

THE INTERNAL REALITY WE CREATE, THE WAY WE FEEL, WHAT WE FEEL, OUR EMOTIONAL STATE DEPENDS ON THE WAY WE PERCEIVE EVENTS. THE WAYS OF PERCEIVING AND LIVING THE REALITY ARE UNLIMITED.

ANY GIVEN SENSATION CAN BE ACCESSED AT ANY MOMENT.

IT ONLY REQUIRES FROM US TO SELECT THE RIGHT CHANNEL. HOW DO WE DO THIS?

THERE ARE TWO WAYS TO CHANGING THE EMOTIONAL STATE AT ANY MOMENT:

 1) CHANGING THE MENTAL ATTITUDE

 2) MAKING USE OF THE BODY, OF THE POSTURE, OF THE PHYSIOLOGY.

LET'S THINK FOR MOMENT OF ONE OF THE MOST LOVELY MEMORIES OF OUR LIVES.

HOW DO WE FEEL ABOUT THIS? WHAT OTHER THIGS COULD WE THINK OF IN ORDER TO FEEL THIS WAY?

MOST PEOPLE, FOR EXAMPLE, WHEN THEY ARE UNHAPPY, THEY START DRINKING, SMOKING, SLEEPING, EATING, OR EVEN DOING DRUGS.

THEY COULD ALSO RECUR TO STRATEGIES SUCH AS DANCING, SINGING, EXERCISING OR MAKING LOVE.

EVERY EMOTION IS ASSOCIATED TO A CONCRETE PHYSIOLOGY IN OUR BODIES. LET'S THINK OF THE POSTURE OF A DEPRESSED PERSON: WE SEE THE SHOULDERS ARE IN A DOWN LOW POSITION, THE HEAD IS DOWN, THE BREATHING IS SHORT AND DEEP, AND SORT OF A MIND-GONE EXPRESSION ON THE FACE.

ON THE OTHER HAND, THE POSTURE OF SOMEONE WHO IS HAPPY SHOWS UP FACING SHOULDERS, THE HEAD IS USUALLY LOOKING UP HIGH AND THE LUNGS SEEMS TO BE FULLY EXPANDED WITH AIR.

WE CAN RECREATE THESE PHYSIOLOGICAL CHANGES DELIBERATELY AND GET INTO THESE DESIRED EMOTIONAL STATES, QUICKLY.

LET'S REALIZE THAT WE CAN SPREAD OUR EMOTIONAL GAMMA WITH THE ONLY CHANGE OF THE MENTAL AND PHYSICAL ATTITUDE.

I WOULD LIKE TO SUGGEST YOU TO DO AN EXERCISE SO YOU CAN SEE IT FOR YOURSELF.

CHOOSE ONE OF THE POSITIVE EMOTIONS YOU WOULD LIKE TO FEEL. THE NEXT STEP IS TO ADOPT THE BODY POSTURE THAT YOU WOULD BE IN SHOULD YOU WERE FEELING THAT FEELING IN THIS PRICISE MOMENT.

-MOVE, TALK AND GESTICULATE THE WAY THAT MATCHES THIS EMOTION

-ENJOY THE SUDDEN CHANGE OF YOUR MOOD

-RECALL EVERY DETAIL

-LISTEN TO THE SOUNDS AROUND YOU

-FEEL YOUR HEART BEAT INCREASE

-BREATHE THE WAY YOU BREATHED AT THAT MOMENT

-PUT THE SAME EXPRESSION ON YOUR FACE AND MOVE THE SAME WAY.

ARE YOU ABLE TO FEEL ENTHUSIASM, EVEN IF IT IS A LITTLE BIT?

YOU WILL BE ABLE TO FEEL THIS WAY AT ANY TIME YOU DESIRE.

THE WAY WE LIVE (EXPERIENCE) EACH SITUATION IN LIFE, DEPENDS ON THE PERSPECTIVE YOU LOOK AT IT FROM, ON THE LENS THROUGH WHICH WE LOOK AT IT. EACH SENSE HAS IT'S OWN SUBDIVISIONS (SUBMODALITIES).

DUE TO THE POWER OF THE MIND, THE CHANGES IN THE SUBMODALITIES CAN PRODUCE IMPORTANT MODIFICATIONS IN THE WAY OF THINKING AND FEELING AND ALSO CHANGES IN THE BEHAVIOR.

"SUBMODALITIES" IS THE TERM WHICH REFERS TO THE DIFFERENT ASPECTS OF THE SENSORIAL CONSCIOUSNESS.

THERE ARE GENERALLY FIVE SENSES: SIGHT, HEARING, TASTE, TOUCH, AND SMELL.

THE NLP WORKS WITH EVERY ONE OF THEM AND HELPS PEOPLE TO ESTABLISH DIFFERENCES IN THE WAY THEY PERCEIVE THE DETAILS OF EACH OF THE SENSES.

FOR INSTANCE, THE SUBMODALITIES OF THE SIGHT ARE: DISTANCES, CLARITY, COLOR, MOVEMENT, SIZE, THE PERCEPTION OF ONESELF. YOU CAN REALLY SEE AN OBJECT OR MENTALLY IMAGINE IT (TO VISUALIZE IT).

THE SUBMODALITIES OF THE HEARING COULD BE:  TONE, VOLUME, RITHM,  PROXIMITY, DIRECTION.  LISTENING IS, ON THE ONE HAND, TO PERCEIVE EXTERNAL SOUNDS AND IT IS ALSO, TO PICTURE OUR OWN VOICE OR OTHER SOUNDS IN A MORE MENTAL WAY.

THE SUBMODALITIES OF THE TOUCH INCLUDE: WARMTH, TEXTURE AND ITCHING. ALSO A FEW EMOTIONAL ANSWERS ARE INCLUDED HERE: CALMNESS, ENTHUSIASM, SADNESS, ENERGY…

THE SUBMODALITIES OF THE TASTE INCLUDE: SWEETNESS, BITTERSWEET, THE BITTER…..

THE SUBMODALITIES OF THE SMELL COULD BE BITTER AND SWEET.

EVERY ONE OF THE SENSES HAS ITS OWN SUBDIVITIONS, AND ONE OF THE MAIN FEATURES OF THE NLP IS ITS CAPACITY TO HELP PEOPLE TO ESTABLISH THIN DIFFERENCES BETWEEN THE ELEMENTS SO THAT LATER CAN BE ARRANGED ON THEIR IMAGINATION  WITH THE PURPOSE OF CREATING NEW AND EFFECTIVE EXPERIENCES.

THE NLP MAKES FROM THIS DEVELOPMENT A TOOL OF COMUNICATION, A GOOD INSTRUMENT TO FACILITATE CHANGE AND WELL BEING.

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